Rita Malvone did — but only after it nearly burned her out as a leader, a human, and as someone trying to make sense of a career that never quite felt like hers.
In this episode, Rita and I unpack the quiet misery of high-performing corporate people: the ones who smile on Zoom, hit the metrics, answer Slacks at 11 p.m.… and privately wonder why they feel so damn empty.
Rita’s story starts in China, leading a young team while simultaneously building an entire Asia-Pacific presence from scratch. On paper? Impressive.
In reality? A slow emotional suffocation disguised as “success.”
She talks openly about being a bad leader — not out of incompetence, but because she was deeply unhappy. The FaceTime culture, the politicking, the performative grind, the “be grateful you even have this job” mindset… all of it slowly turned her into someone she didn’t like.
When the company finally told her she was 47th in line for a promotion, she snapped the trap in half.
Leaving wasn’t graceful. It wasn’t strategic.
It was survival.
And looking back, Rita realized something hard but beautiful:
You can’t become the leader you want to be inside a system that requires you to betray yourself.
We dig into the aftermath of walking away, the shock of rediscovering joy, the messy years of rebuilding, and how real leadership is less “motivational poster” and more “doing the hard, human, unglamorous work.”
We talk about why suffering gives leaders their edge, why authenticity can’t be faked, and why corporate life fails people who don’t fit the mold — no matter how capable they are.
This isn’t a rage story.
It’s a liberation story.
No villains. No corporate-hate screeds. Just an honest look at the moment you realize your career is using you more than you’re using it — and what happens when you finally walk out.
TL;DR
The trap: A prestigious career that looks like success and feels like misery.
The break point: Being told she was “#47 in line for a promotion.”
The turn: Leaving corporate, owning how unhappy she truly was, and rebuilding a life that isn’t powered by performance, FaceTime, or pretending.
The lesson: You can’t lead well while losing yourself.
Memorable Lines
“I wasn’t a bad leader. I was an unhappy human pretending to be a leader.”
“We were building the seats as we were sitting in them.”
“You can’t sugarcoat how miserable you are and still expect to lead well.”
“Once I stepped out, I finally saw the cage I had been sitting in.”
Guest
Rita Malvone — Leadership coach, former corporate executive in China, and someone who rebuilt her life after discovering her ‘career’ was a beautifully decorated cage.
🔗 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ritamalvone/
🔗 Website: https://www.ritamalvone.com/
Why This Matters
Most founders, leaders, and high achievers were never taught to question the path — only to climb it.
Rita’s story is a reminder that:
Success without autonomy is just a gilded cage.
Misery disguised as ambition always leaks into your leadership.
People don’t need more frameworks — they need leaders who’ve been through fire and came back softer, not harder.
Walking away isn’t quitting. It’s choosing yourself.
Call to Action
If this conversation lit something up for you, don’t just let it fade. Come join me inside the Second Life Leader community on Skool. That’s where I share the frameworks, field reports, and real stories of reinvention that don’t make it into the podcast. You’ll connect with other professionals who are actively rebuilding and leading with clarity. The link is in the show notes—step inside and start building your Second Life today.
